It runs in the family. How to find your soul mate? The psychology of love

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2018-03-27 20:48:16

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Many people are convinced that love – an invention of poets and dreamers. Those who never met a man that caused a deep feeling of respect and attachment.

Some believe that the true saying: "sterpitsya - slyubitsya". We should not expect a person who will cause an explosion of emotions, and need to build relationships with those who are near. Others spend a life in search of that one, from the appearance of which everything in life will change around and play with bright colors. If you want to sort out this problem, is to meet with a proposed article.

what is "love" definition

What is love?

The Definition of the above-mentioned sense can be found in the works of the classics of world literature, in dictionaries, monographs in psychology. S. Ozhegova referred to the cardiac affection, which can manifest itself in selfless actions toward people, home, music, etc. In the proposed article we will talk about the relationship between men and women, a special kind of love. The pictures offered to your attention, you can see three different definitions:

  • This classic of Russian literature;
  • "the Little Prince", an allegorical tale Exupery;
  • Made by the child, perceiving the world through the eyes of an adult.

They are All different, but certainly the majority will agree with every. And even try to give my own, based on personal experience, that too will have a right to exist. Since we are talking about feelings, and they are often very subjective.

Psychology of love of man to woman

Consider from the point of view of psychology, what love is. The definition includes three aspects:

  1. Physical attraction, passion.
  2. Emotional closeness.
  3. Moral obligations.

About the bird and the crane

More and more Young people speaks and thinks in quotes, not bothering to read classic works. Everyone knows the saying about the crane and the bird, determining for themselves whether to agree to the fact that next, or try to realize his dream. Someone picked the bird in his hands and unexpectedly happy, but someone still longingly stare at the sky. Why is this happening?

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A Very important childhood and relationships between family members, where she was raised. The first man in her life is the father. That it creates self-esteem and provides a future scenario relationships with the opposite sex.

If it spoils the daughter admires her, care about her and turns dreams into reality, the girls will form self-esteem, the correct attitude and adequate ideas of future choice.

sterpitsya - slyubitsya, what do you mean

But the permissiveness and indulging the whims generates high expectations from the partner, while the lack of love and care – low self-esteem and lack of rigor.

Great importance is the example of a father and his attitude to his wife. The children laid a perfect idea how it should be. They are looking for any such thing, or, on the contrary, diametrically opposite.

Who wants a pie? As a rule, women with high self-esteem or having the good fortune to grow up in a family dominated by a genuine love and understanding. This poem Eduard Asadov "Freak".

the Family - will endure

How to find a soul mate

The Main mistake – to look for, relying on the "spark" and the appearance of passion. Love – the feeling is deeper than just physical attraction, what we talked about above. Therefore, the inclusion of the rational element in the first stage is very important. Mesalliance ("the lady and the hooligan", "a businesswoman and a homeless person") rarely result in harmonious relationships. We offer you five successive steps, allowing you to get closer to the goal:

  1. Draw a mental portrait of the chosen one, including his age, education, income level, life values and priorities.
  2. "the Family – will be endured" exactly does not work there where the woman doesn't care about her looks and unsure of herself.
  3. You Need to expand your circle of friends, focusing on Hobbies and travel.
  4. Be selective. Do not give in to them, if the personality of the partner you're not interested and common topics of conversation.
  5. Don't ignore the possibilities of Dating sites.

How to understand that it is

Paradoxically, the emergence of these feelings both have to be ready for it. That's why 35 % of men and 37% of females ever recorded on the relevant Internet sites. In terms of choice of heart will tell you who causes the greatest emotional response. You should be able to weed out early those who absolutely do not fit. First and foremost is:

  • In search of recreational opportunities offered, including an intimate nature.
  • Do Not meet your basic requirements.
  • People, telling a little about yourself and obviously interested in gathering information about the partner.

How to understand that the man that caused interest and which give pleasure, – is the one which has a future and can be a real feeling? "Sterpitsya-slyubitsya" – that means for the elect?

saying in the family - will endure

Given that love –feeling directed to another person, the main criterion should be the step that everyone is ready to go for another. For example, quit bad habits, to reconsider their values, to reject any goods or to move on. This question first should ask yourself. And if the answer is negative, then it is not love.

A Little about saying

In earlier times, the main purpose has always been considered the continuation of the human race. If a person is born, he would have to continue the chain. It reads in the words "man" ("husband") and "woman" (wife"). In the young these days the age of man had already started a family regardless if it was born he has feelings for someone or not. In the 18-19 years old girl was known as perestroka. My father would often put her on a cart and carried through the villages in search of the groom. Therefore, parents often connive with each other at the stage when their daughters and sons were still children.

Does this Mean that the adage "sterpitsya-slyubitsya" laid some comfort to those who have not experienced the real feelings? In fact, in Russia rarely used the word "love", often sounded – "regret." In this compassion, patience, and sacrifice. It was believed that during the years of the birth and upbringing of children the couple has become so native that turned into a unified whole. Love may be compared with the poetry of patience. That is, in the saying lay not a consolation, but this seed of love.

Modern look

Today, more and more the destiny of man see in his self-realization, the development of professional and creative career. Children sometimes not only sidelined, but there is a growing movement of so-called childfree – people who do not want to have them.

Not everything is focused on family creation, preferring the companionship of the opposite sex without mutual obligations. Promoted relationships that should be easy in communication. When difficulties, misunderstandings, recommendations about change of partner. In pursuit of the ideal many girls marry later or remain single, raising children in an incomplete family.

relations between family members

New research

So is it worth waiting or better to create a family with a guy who are sympathetic and fit the other parameters? Is it true that sterpitsya-slyubitsya?

American researchers have conducted an experiment: lonely people showed pictures of 112 people of the opposite sex. While they were asked to evaluate appearance on a 9-point scale. As it turned out? If the same photo across subjects for the fourth time, his grades greatly increased. Dr. Tiruchelvam proved that man is able to feel sympathy for another not immediately but in time. Once had the opportunity to become better acquainted. This, incidentally, is confirmed by the numerous office romances. Psychologically, people are more willing to love what it familiar.

Gender differences

There is an opinion that men and women have different perception of the expression "sterpitsya - slyubitsya". The secret of relationship lies in gender differences. Man is essentially a hunter, it needs to achieve its second half, to overcome obstacles and even to steal her from the other males. Under pressure from women and the manifestation of her obsessive initiative, he may marry but will never love. The man still with domostroevskogo times tend to take the care for granted. If the other half hopes that his Ministry to the beloved she will achieve results, it will be the exception rather than the rule.

But for women, the motto "sterpitsya-slyubitsya" works in most. Not by chance these mothers advise daughters to create a family with those men who are experiencing more powerful feelings for his beloved, than she is. Valid for the strict rule that women can fall in love out of gratitude. Their inspiring attitude on the part of the partner.

sterpitsya-slyubitsya, secret relations

The Psychology of love of man to woman

If the fair half light, when experiencing strong emotions, and to ignore it is impossible, that men do not like to analyze their feelings. Manifestations of their love are different from women's and often described as the fear of losing the object of attachment, desire to care for and admire you. What about this show? Phone calls, the desire to meet competition with other males for the right to be with a woman. If the representative of a strong half of mankind avoids meetings, no calls – do not look for reasons outside. Who is he that seeks to be close.

Concern is manifested in the desire to give advice, experience about health, mood, lady. "When you get there, I need to know", – these are the real words of love on the part of men. The rapture should not be confused with compliments. The last to speak can not all, but only the woman whose intelligence, beauty and sincerity captivate your chosen partner will be really desirable.

Conclusion

Returning to the definition of love, you should pay attention to the third aspect. What is moral obligation? This sense of responsibility for another person, the sacrifice that brings happiness and loving yourself. Because love asks for nothing, she gives. Knows no fear, has no reason. "Can endure- slyubitsya" – the spiritual unity in which the other person becomes like a part of you. And you can not deliver, can not be left in the lurch.


Article in other languages:

AR: https://tostpost.com/ar/self-improvement/8256-it-runs-in-the-family-how-to-find-your-soul-mate-the-psychology-of-lov.html

BE: https://tostpost.com/be/sama-daskanalenne/14737-scerp-cca---zlyub-cca-yak-znaysc-svayu-palo-ku-ps-halog-ya-lyubov.html

DE: https://tostpost.com/de/selbstverbesserung/14739-bleibt-in---so-finden-sie-ihren-traumpartner-die-psychologie-der-liebe.html

ES: https://tostpost.com/es/la-superaci-n-personal/14746-sterpitsya---slyubitsya-encontrar-a-tu-alma-gemela-la-psicolog-a-del-a.html

HI: https://tostpost.com/hi/self-improvement/8259-it-runs-in-the-family-how-to-find-your-soul-mate-the-psychology-of-lov.html

JA: https://tostpost.com/ja/self-improvement/8258-it-runs-in-the-family-how-to-find-your-soul-mate-the-psychology-of-lov.html

KK: https://tostpost.com/kk/z-n--z-zhet-ld-ru/14740-sterpitsya---slyubitsya-alay-z-layykty-psihologiya-mahabbat.html

PL: https://tostpost.com/pl/samodoskonalenie/14734-sterpitsya---slyubitsya-jak-znale-swoj-bratni-dusz-psychologia-mi-o-ci.html

PT: https://tostpost.com/pt/auto-aperfei-oamento/14728-sterpitsya---slyubitsya-como-encontrar-a-sua-alma-g-mea-a-psicologia-d.html

TR: https://tostpost.com/tr/kendini-geli-tirme/14743-kendisini-sevmeye-slyubitsya-nas-l-bir-ruh-e-ini-bulmak-m-psikoloji-a-.html

UK: https://tostpost.com/uk/samovdoskonalennya/14738-sterpit-sya---zlyubit-sya-yak-znayti-svoyu-polovinku-psiholog-ya-lyubo.html

ZH: https://tostpost.com/zh/self-improvement/9026-it-runs-in-the-family-how-to-find-your-soul-mate-the-psychology-of-lov.html






Alin Trodden - author of the article, editor
"Hi, I'm Alin Trodden. I write texts, read books, and look for impressions. And I'm not bad at telling you about it. I am always happy to participate in interesting projects."

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